The Guardian of Love - Joan Shepherd

A beautiful blond goddess and her earthly man

Were hit by Cupid’s arrow some time ago

Over Valentine’s Day, a day to celebrate lovers

They flew to San Francisco then came to my town 

I gave them a glass of champagne and a bed

A tour the next day while he gazed at her beauty

Rubbing her arm, nuzzling her neck

The earthling and a goddess

On a short break from work

In a romantic city over Valentine’s Day

Three weeks after their short vacation

The Guardian of Love made a visit

Without them being aware they were being evaluated

Checking if their love was genuine, as they professed

The Guardian of Love put his observations

In the machine he invented, with a needle that moved

On the dial that tells her, “Does he love me or does he not”

And for him, the same. 

The Earthing was evaluated first.

The machine’s needle seemed uncertain, back and forth 

Between two points, does he love her or does he not

Raising the question if his love for her was real.

Then the Godess

The needle seemed to be firm at 12 o’clock

Pointing neither to he right nor the left

Only to be interpreted as “maybe”

Maybe she loved him and maybe she needed him

So much in common, both divorced, both nurses  

They looked good together

Him holding her, touching her

As if to see if she was real, if he was so lucky

To find a goddess next to him

How could she not love him?

But the Guardian wasn’t fooled with superficial actions

The needle stayed at 12 o’clock, neither yes or no

And decided this earthly handsome man was not sincere

But the earthling didn’t even know it 

And she didn’t realize if it was love or need

The Guardian of Love, wanting to make sure

Only true lovers were qualified to get his stamp of approval

Checking for the earthling if she loved him 

Had more difficulty with the blond goddess

She wanted love, needed love, and could give it in return

She deserved to be loved, a troublesome marriage

Where drugs became a necessity for him

 to maintain his irresponsible behavior

While she worked professionally and being a mother.

Yes, she deserved to be loved this time

But this earthly man wasn’t the right one

And the Guardian of Love could not give
his stamp of approval.

Yesterday, she called me, this lovely blond goddess

Sniffing her way through a gasping conversation.

The earthling had called her 

Said they were on different paths

He wouldn’t be seeing her anymore

The Guardian of Love and his invented machine

Had made the right prediction.  

Public Phone Call - Dave Lewis

There has been a good deal of noise about governments monitoring phone calls. However, no one seems to worry about their phone calls made in the most public circumstances. One that I heard, wishing it were not happening, made me wonder how concerned people really were about their privacy. 

While I was waiting to renew my driver’s license at the Division of Motor Vehicles, a young lady in the next chair made a call which I am reconstructing to the best of my recollection.

The phone is apparently ringing after a number is called up from the smart-phone files.

“ Chuck, this is Patty. Where ever have you been. I have left messages and texts. Are you Ok? Are you still in Philadelphia?  I have been taking care of little FIFI for over a week now and the first few days she was nervous and seemed to miss you. Now she sleeps with me and is adjusted to my schedule.”

“Of course I had seen her at your place but she didn’t really know me.”

“No problem, she is fine but you... you  were planning to be away for only two days.  I had to get more food for her and get her a few toys so she wouldn’t chew the table legs. I hadn’t been around dogs before.”

“No, I like her all right but what has delayed you?  You are in St. Louis?  I thought you were going to Philadelphia.”

“Why did you stop off in St. Louis?” 

“Oh yes, I remember that is where you went to high school but you never talked about going back for a visit.  What is the occasion?”

“ Your high school sweetheart just filed for divorce?  You had to console her?  Surely she’s a big girl now and you have been out of St. Louis for what …12 years.  You are a CPA for God’s sake not a counselor.”

“You got engaged!  You plan to marry her as soon as the divorce is final?  We have been going together for five years and sleeping together for four years, eleven months and twenty-eight days.  You never mentioned ‘Engagement’ to me! “

“Oh, I see. It is all OK by YOU because you have never forgotten her!    What is her name?”

“You’d rather not say because she values her privacy! What about the hickey you made on my neck!  Do you think that doesn’t infringe on MY privacy? What about the nude pictures of me that you took and sent to your friends?  How long do you think it took for someone at work to run across them.? Privacy my foot! “

“FAVORS! You want to ask some favors?  Sounds like you haven’t lost any audacity.   So you want me to return the ring you gave me and keep FIFI because your new fiance is allergic to dogs?  Well, as far as the ring is concerned: FORGET IT!  We both know it isn’t a real diamond or actually gold.”

“I asked a jeweler when it turned my finger green, that’s how I know.  You can look for it beneath the Golden Gate Bridge.“ 

  

“ Well, as for FIFI, I am glad to trade HER for YOU.  FIFI is smarter than you, has better manners, doesn’t smell bad and doesn’t pee on the bathroom floor.  She’s also better in bed! All your stuff will be in a storage locker.  I’ll mail you a key  at your work address after you send me a check to cover the rent.”

“You have taken a new job in St. Louis?  Well so what, figure out how to get the mail forwarded. And don’t bother to call or text me, I am setting my phone up to block your contacts.    Adios hombre!”

The lady seemed not in the least  perturbed as she fiddled with her Smart Phone and began a game of solitaire. 

The DVM clerk finally called my number.

Editors note: This story is all fiction.

The Last Great Whale - Noris Binet

One shining morning I was standing on a deck looking at the waters of the Pacific. I don’t recall how I got there but because the ocean holds the purity of all forms for me and a sense of wonder, its vastness always takes me in as if I am a new born, full of amazement.  There is no particular time for me to be at the ocean; any time is a great time. When I cannot be there for a long while, it’s as if I am being deprived of life’s sustaining energy.  At the ocean I feel that I am before the beginning of all of life’s creation. 

On this auspicious Sunday I was alone but aware of people moving about in a holiday spirit on the wharf, browsing the restaurants and shops nearby.  Suddenly right in front of me a couple of medium-sized whales appeared jumping and playing. I was delighted just to watch them as they moved freely, frolicking in the waters with so much ease. I was only fifteen to twenty feet from the young mammals and the deck was only a few feet higher than the water.  When they slipped back below its surface I stood mesmerized by their beauty, their sleek skin and the magnificence of their sheer size. How lucky I thought, to be able to witness them that closely, almost in reach of my hand! I felt so privileged at that moment realizing that I was part of…,  

And before I could finish the thought I was impacted by the force of a huge, archaic marine creature, which emerged from the ocean with such might that the water spilled out from her jump, wetting my face and clothes.  I was in awe, shaken, and thrilled to be in the presence of such an amazing being, before whom I could neither move or do a thing and thus became absolutely still at such greatness and wild presence.  The wetness covering my face felt glorious as if it was a baptism of some kind and now I realize that it was just that! This magnificent creature from the mysterious depth had baptized me. 

Her mammoth proportions overwhelmed my senses to such a degree that I knew that I could never be the same after this startling encounter. It is impossible to meet “the magnificent” without being transformed. 

What is this? Who is this? All my questions fell away as my eyes were transfixed upon her, being totally hypnotized by this grandiose energy that felt so primal and ancient as the original mother of all life.  I was fully present and entered into a timeless-time without beginning or end realizing that  that moment is still here with me now. 

I wanted to capture her in form; and be able to see her image over and over. This fascination overtook me so that I couldn’t but take a pencil and begin to sketch her from memory. 

Despite my immediate self-doubt about replicating her form, the magnificent creature emerged from the paper without struggle exactly as she appeared to me, spontaneous and free. Drawing her allowed me to be with her and to see the details that were imprinted on the depth of my psyche, without me even knowing it. Amazing revelations have begun to happen as her primordial energy continued to take form, communicating slowly why she came to see me. 

I am unable to unveil the details of her communication because it is a process that is unfolding intra-psychically and thus can’t be named or conceptualized. It can only be felt.  And that, I can share:  It feels like a resurrection; as if deeper forces that were dormant have begun to resurface to lead me through a world of symbols,  the meaning of which can only be revealed when they are experienced, not before. It is moving in the unknown only following inner impulses, before the defining thoughts of what is happening have emerged in the mind. 

As I began to research whether anyone had seen this being before, or whether there are tales about her, I found that no one had seen her exactly as did I. Yet cultures all over the world consider whales as the “earth’s record keeper for all time, inspiring us to listen to the inner voice”. “The whale’s being is associated with the wisdom and awareness of the spiritual realm, blending the conscious and the unconscious into an undivided whole.” 

Throughout my life I have felt compelled to dwell in the depth of the psyche. I have come to realize that as I navigate in the emotional depth of the unconscious world that I can swim with “the magnificent” without being totally overwhelmed by her power. Instead, I am guided by her beauty and serenity.  When I am able to allow her energy to express itself in me I can move without resistance in the fluidity of this life.  I can come out to breathe and the experience of the breath can be a moment of illumination. 

 As the record keeper “the great Whale” came to me knowing what is necessary for my maturation to unfold and to guide my entry across the threshold of my own transmigration. Her energy brought about my realignment with the full expression of creativity and spiritual awakening as the ultimate purpose of this life. 

She was the last archaic, gigantic whale wandering, looking for me in the great vastness of the ocean and now we are together. Now, she has come home. She lives deeply within myself and within yourselves, ready to be activated, embracing us as The Magnificent, the great Mother of all.

The author's sketch

Harboring A Secret - Joan Shepherd

Margaret told me a secret

And added, “Don’t tell anyone” 

A secret burns inside me

In my stomach and in my brain

A neon sign flashes the tale

While I do the dishes

Or shopping for peanut butter

“Don’t tell anyone”, but…

Those are words I don’t want to hear

Because usually, that’s the first thing

I want to do. Surely Marie should know

And she would keep it with her

While I would not.

I do not want to tell anyone

And if it was so mundane

It isn’t worth repeating or even remembering. 

I wish she hadn’t told me

And added “Don’t tell anyone..”

I once knew a mother  

Who told her troublesome first grade son

before he left for school

“Don’t throw rocks at people

Don’t take that rope to school

to tie kids to the flagpole

Don’t ignore it when the teacher says:

To drink their juice nicely and

not spit it on the floor.” 

Of course, those are the very things

The kid did, like a good soldier

Following instructions. 

OK, I’ve heard the secret and kept it within me

For three and a half days. Haven’t told a soul. 

Even if I wanted to, because Lucy really should know.

I wish my friend had never told me her secret

And said, ”Don’t tell anybody!”

I haven’t. 

But…

I  probably will.  

Guardian of Love - Robyn Makaruk

O Jupiter!

I see you shining brightly in the night sky

Beaming down on me

I like to think that you as a father

Might be cradling my father

Who left me sixty-eight years ago.

I can see him as I remember him

Tall, handsome, forever young.

I hope he is still proud of me,

As he was then reading my first school work

Passed through the hospital window.

I have been blessed in this life

Where there have been many who have left 

So I deeply cherish those still here

Who have my heart until I leave

And join you all as stardust.

I know that my guardian of love

Is your daughter, Venus

Soon to make her appearance in the night sky.

Maserati Blues - Steve Bakalyer

She slams the microwave shut

He slaps down the paper

“Damn it

I didn’t say

I was going to buy it”

storms out of the kitchen

She retrieves her coffee

reads the ad

Maserati: excellence through passion.

Performance and pleasure unlimited. 

examines the photo

brushes her finger across

the emblem on the hood

a trident, like the spear tip

of Neptune’s statue

that watched their first kiss

in Bologna’s Piazza Maggiore

Passion, performance, pleasure

all flagging now

no lovers’ word-glue to bind them

soft words trapped in throats

sharp words escaping in a

ping-pong of recriminations

Death of a marriage

by a thousand cuts

yesterday’s in the convertible

blowing to hell her new hairdo

crafted to charm

he oblivious

tuned only to the engine

purring sweetly

Isaac, You Din't Tell Us

Gravity. We don’t think about it as we grow up—until a teacher talks about Isaac Newton. In science class we learned about the law of gravitation. But the subject soon leaks from our minds, except for some who get obsessed by it, like Einstein, who spent his life wrestling with gravity. Among his victories was the prediction that the sun’s gravity would bend the light coming from stars.

Stephen Hawking also fiddled a lot with gravity. Talked about it in his book A Brief History of Time (you know, the book that lays unopened on coffee tables throughout the land). Hawking’s thing is black holes, astronomical bodies with such intense gravity that not even light can escape. 

Like most people, I’ve been indifferent to gravity over the years. But now I am a senior, a person allowed to sit in the first-row seats on Portland busses, the ones labeled “honored citizens.”

Now gravity has my attention. It’s changing me, and it’s pissing me off. In my insecure youth, acne eventually subsided. But my big ears persisted, and I grudgingly made my peace with them. But now they’re getting bigger, even as I get shorter and hair abandons my pate. I’m having to adjust all over again. Matthew Parris, columnist in The Times of London, asked: "Are there any pills you can take to shrink them? Never mind penis enlargement. I'm looking for ear reduction."

Research has shown that ears lengthen about 0.2 mm per year. It’s not that the cartilage grows. No, it just continually loses the battle against gravity. Isaac, you didn’t tell us.

And there’s another thing neither you nor our teachers mentioned. We learned about those three delicate bones, the semicircular canals, and that spiral thingy. But we were not taught about the utricle, a chamber at one end of the canals. It contains little crystals of calcium carbonate that are waiting like errant mines for a chance to drift into the semicircular canals and raise hell: when we move our head, inertia causes the crystals to rub against the canal walls, sending confusing signals to the brain.

This happened to me—the room spinning, dizziness, nausea. It was BPPV, benign paroxysmal positional vertigo. Your first law of motion, Isaac, the one about inertia, was making me miserable.

I wonder if not being taught about the utricle and those sneaky crystals was a conspiracy of my elders, an attempt to paint the body a rosy hue, lest I dread the onset of old age? Well, probably not. When young we’re not concerned with the downward trajectory of aging. We are then all about the future—onward and upward. The lyric “cigarettes, whisky and wild wild women” comes to mind.

One more complaint. My ears are letting me down. And modern electronics hasn’t filled the gap very well. The only change I notice with my expensive hearing aids, custom tuned to bump up the high frequencies, is that I now hear a whistle made by my toilet tank valve when flushing. This life enhancement I can do without.

OK. Enough complaining. There are many books that tell us how to be happy. I haven’t read them. But I imagine they say at least this: look on the bright side.

I can do that. Let’s see: I can hear. Those vibrations coursing through my inner ear bring me mocking birds in the morning, interviews by Terry Gross, Norwegian Wood by Lennon-McCartney, and cicadas in the evening. At night my brain shuts off my ear switch until the next morning, when I hear again the lovely symphony of life.