Looking back, I can call it that, but I certainly wouldn’t have given it that name, at that time, when I think one such was called for, as when you’re trying to get your kids into the car or bus to go visit grandma and pa. There’s a reluctance on their part to leave the house on a free-from-school weekend ,
and so persuasion - the gentle art of persuasion - well, let’s call it what it is: control (and threats) come to the rescue, and the trip goes off on time, etc, etc. Not as easy to do when your husband, who’s feeling lousy, refuses to go for a check-up as he doesn’t like going to the doctor. You get him there, but is there a printable name for how you did it?
We hone these arts over time. They get recognized for what they are, so any alternative method is seen for just what it is: at threat or a bribe,based on tired, worn-out repetition.
What is the alternative? There are several, but one is just “letting go.” The magnificent art which gift is so difficult to unwrap. It challenges our very meaning, our position, etc., in life. Will we have any value if we let go.... any value to others, but also to our selves - are we valuable after letting go of all those life-long habits that served us so well?
Well, you could look it up and find out that there is a lot of thought given to this subject. It can be quite a discovery of new attitudes you’ll uncover about your self, about the importance of dusting, of putting away your clothes, of joining the ..... club that sponsors the ....., of resigning from years of volunteering at the..... for the local whatever, and so on.
If you try letting go, it takes great courage. Your responses have become a reflex, an old routine, even an addiction which is a habit you fall back on and can’t resist its easy solution. You might want to be gentle - as well as firm - with your self, plunging in, as you would be, to a new version of
who you are with your new decisions.
Ultimately, in the long, life run, it’s much better than a new face lift or Harley-Davidson or - and this is stretching it a bit - a lovely beach house a half day’s flight away, a different kind of investment entirely.
And, of course, since old habits die hard, you can always revert back to the art you know so well.
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