Joan devil

She knew she had a chance to win that would erase her horrible mistake but also might get some severe punishment. Not surprisingly, her hands were shaking with nerves on edge ever since she made the deal with the devil. Rosalie had the heaven and hell lectures since early childhood and they usually guided her behavior. But that one time, she just went ahead without the lectures going through her head. 

“Three chances”, the devil had told her.” They may be something you want or something you would choose to avoid.” She had agreed to it since she felt guilty and frustrated and had no other recourse. 

The date was purposely set by the devil on Easter Sunday. He could take a human form at times and had made arrangements for a small stage set near the hill where the early morning sunrise service for the Lutherans would be held. As daylight began, one could see that the rains had turned the rolling hills near Petaluma a nice green, thick yellow mustard plants covered the spaces between vines in nearby vineyards, while many daffodils were blooming adjacent to the chairs set up for the service.  Those arriving at the site hardly noticed the small stage with three red curtains set vertically across the stage. Maybe it was to be part of the service, some thought. 

Rosalie was there early but chose a chair in the Lutheran section to wait. She was not sure when the devil would appear nor what he would look like. How could she make sure he really was the devil if he looked like an ordinary man, which he said he would be? The discomfort in her stomach increased by the minute. Did she bring any Tums? People began arriving, ministers were conversing, something about communion and handling the crowd. She was distracted watching when there was a tap on her shoulder.

 
“I think you are sitting in the wrong seat,” a good-looking rather short man said softly in her ear. Startled, she looked at his smiling face and he winked. “Come!” He took her arm and they started walking toward the little stage. Some people watched them leave but thought it must be part of the program. 

On the wooden stage, which was actually only about 5 inches high, were the three curtains, each one on individual stands placed about three feet apart. 

“You can choose any one of the three first. You must decide if you want to keep that message or take you chances on one of the others.  Are you ready? You will either be absolved of the terrible thing you did and go over to the Lutherans for a Christian blessing or take your punishment as noted behind two of the curtains.

Rosalie chose #3 quickly. She was too anxious to drag this out. The devil pulled up the curtain and a printed message said: You must leave this country, take a different persona, pay all expenses and fend for yourself.  Wherever you go, I will visit you once a month. Before you leave, you will have plastic surgery making some vertical scars in a design on your cheeks that make up will not cover. How you earn money is your problem. 

That was pretty bad, she thought, but what could be worse? I still have a 50/50 chance for something better. But what if that was the “good” one? At least I would be alive and not face criminal charges. 

“Come now,” said the devil. “I haven’t got all day. Is this your choice or do we go on?”

Rosalie was so nervous already and she didn’t really trust the devil man. She wondered if he still had his power in this transformation.

Almost without thinking, she blurted out, “I’ll take #1.”

Her heart pounded as he moved to #1, paused and grinned at her. “Are you sure? You could still change your mind.”

“Yes, just do it. I can’t take much more of this.”

“You made the deal,” he said taunting her, enjoying her anxiety. “OK, it’s # 1” and pulled the curtain. 

The message behind this curtain said, You will now be…but Rosalie couldn’t read the rest because tears blurred her vision and it was in smaller print.  She rubbed her eyes.

“Do you want me to read it to you?” asked the devil man.  He was blocking her view of  #1 message but more than that, she wondered if she was going crazy because his dignified suit had turned red. 

“What…” both the devil and Rosalie said together, both of them surprised at what was happening to him.

“Oh, shit be damned, curses on all of you, this isn’t fair, you stupid mortals making a heaven and hell. Just look over there, those believers in a God they have never seen. And right here is the devil himself. What do people want, an image of a man to guide and forgive them or a real person who has the facility to change appearance?  God damn it” and now he was shouting. “Even I am subject to rules.  Why couldn’t I stay a man a little longer?” He added as he felt a tail emerging.” 

Rosalie couldn’t believe what she was hearing and seeing. She thought it ironic that the devil would think his situation was unfair, he who challenges and gives temptations to all, but most of all, his change in appearance. His head was the last to change from the red torso, legs and tail.

“Well, at least I fooled you,” he laughed with glee. “You were such an easy target. After that kid ran into the street in front of your car, he fell and you thought you ran over him. If you had stopped, you would have seen that he just kept still and was safe under the car with wheels moving on either side of him. You hesitated, saw his still body lying there and thought maybe he was dead. That was a horrible mistake to keep driving and not checking.  And that’s when I decided to punish you myself.”

Now it was Rosalie’s turn. “You horrible, despicable, creature to enjoy tormenting people. Go to hell, that’s where you belong. I hope you never are able to tempt people in your human form again. Curses on you! I hate you! You are disgusting! Get out of my sight.” 

There was a red streak moving quickly away from the little stage, Rosalie was shouting and crying with her words. The commotion caused some heads turning from their service, still not knowing what was going on. If anyone saw the devil in his authentic devil’s attire, running down the hill, his figure getting smaller and smaller, they were not aware of the significance.

 A group of five men and woman, with strong melodic Lutheran voices, began to sing,

“Oh Happy Day”.  

Yes, Rosalie thought, Oh Happy Day and started humming as she walked across the grass toward the Lutherans. 

2014

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